“I applied my heart to know wisdom, and to know madness and folly. I perceived that this also was a chasing after wind. For in much wisdom is much grief; and he who increases knowledge increases sorrow.”
– The Holy Bible: Ecclesiastes 1:17-18
Pretty interesting quote coming from me, eh? I think I can get away with a quote from the Bible every now and again. I’ve always had an interesting time with this one – you could say that this teaches that you should be ignorant: that seeking to understand, question and know more will only bring you pain. Perhaps, but those of us who spend a lot of time in such endeavors know this line is pretty accurate: I perceived that this also was a chasing after wind. We won’t know, but we want to know – we want to understand and be understood. But, quite often, it is in this quest that we lose sight of the simplest truths that anchor us; those that keep us from being swept into the depths of reason, perception and subjectivity.
If you think I talk a lot, ramble or seem long-winded, I don’t know if you can imagine what goes on inside my head at any given moment. Whenever someone asks me what I was just thinking about, I try to pick what is most relevant to the conversation or situation at hand to answer, because it’s usually a lot of things. Correlations, complications, variables, emotional consideration, logic, influence all of these things seem to insert themselves into every thought that runs through my head and I wonder very often if such things really carry more positive than negative. Thoughts can be very mutinous things as well, as I’m sure you can glean either from personal experience or just by reading previous posts. I’ve never quite found a good balance for not over-analyzing or over-thinking things. Every now and then I manage not to do this, but it still remains a constant thorn in my side. As such, except in certain situations, I find it infinitely difficult to act without far too many considerations, which is an up and down sort of thing.
I think far too much. My thoughts often involve more information than anything you’ve seen me write. It comes with the ADHD, the constant search for knowledge and plenty of other things. Interestingly enough though is that I have too many words and, more often than not, I never seem to get out exactly what ‘m trying to say – sometimes to extreme detriment, but I think that’s a problem for all of us who have too many words running around in our heads. I’ve been out and around today – I ran into Cassie and Steve up at Jupiter house after talking briefly about music with a nice girl whose name I sadly cannot remember – then dropped off the kids and now I’m out again. There’s more to write, but I’d rather not jump from one topic into the next, so I’ll tackle that later in the evening, perhaps. I didn’t feel the need or want for some long explanation on this – just that I think that too much contemplation and consideration often leads to me sticking my foot in my mouth.
Recent Comments